88th requested review is of We can drive it home with one headlight
Rating out of 10: 6

layout etc. (2: 2)
I really like everything about this layout except for a few minor things. I don’t really like blue on black. My eyes hurt already and I haven’t even been at the site more than two minutes. It is readable, and I’ve seen worse, but I’d really prefer something a little easier on my eyes. How about adding a white or light-colored table used only for the journal entry with some black text? And another thing, please use a larger font size too.

I also would prefer the diary not to have a splash page because I just don’t think it is necessary unless you have OTHER sites you are also the author of and have links for them on that splash page. Otherwise, I don’t see the use for it except to have a bit of artwork that you can have on the diary page by itself if you really wanted.

The title is weird and I probably wouldn’t understand it at all if I didn’t listen to the band The Wallflowers. Oh, and by the way I hope he realizes he never gives accreditation to the band for the lyrics although he does have a link that has the full song on it. I suggest at least adding the name of the band somewhere.

It took me a few minutes to figure out that some of his links when clicked do not change the page except to add additional links in the bottom frame. After I realized it I thought this was a pretty neat feature. Overall I really like the way the journal navigates.

The stars around the titles everywhere are nice and I like the font used for them as well. But I don’t understand what it is with men and blue/black colors. Are all other colors too girly or what? Explain this to me.

I have to say this has to be one of the absolute best uses of an in-line scroll that I have ever seen. Good job, I’m impressed.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
He is an ellipses abuser, but who isn’t out there? It is rare that I find someone that doesn’t trail off sentences with three periods. And it is SO annoying.

I’d rather not read things like, “I don’t know what to write about…” (PS That was a proper use of an ellipsis.)

Unique: (2: 1)
This is no template, it is an independent site not something off of diaryland. I was really impressed with how good the navigation was; impressed enough to think it is unique among the diaries I’ve seen.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
“I don't know.. maybe I'm making a big deal out of nothing, and maybe it's just this huge misunderstanding, but whenever I try to make friends it just doesn't seem to work out. Before when I lived in another town I had to move when I'd just settled down, and it's never quite seemed here that I was as much of a friend to people as they were to me. I just really don't know anymore. Sometimes it's hard to really be sure of anything, people especially.”

“Maybe I should just say things that are on my mind instead of thinking about what I'm thinking, as it's late and confusion is abound. Where is your life headed? (Let's not get schizophrenic or anything.) My future is really dependent on whether or not I've been accepted. I may not be able to go to college, anyway, due to the fact that we don't have a lot of money right now, or any time, for that matter.”

“I'm not even sure what I want to say anymore. You were one of the greatest friends I ever had. I thought it was something special. I don't guess it's special enough. You said you notice there are other things worth living for, yet the one man you'll love is the only thing that can make you happy. I ran that past my brain, and it says that's garbage. That's crap. I'm so sorry I'm not the one person who can bring meaning to your life, or reassure you have meaning, or whatever. You know, that's what I was trying to do all along. When you were sad, I tried to think of something that would make you happy. I don't guess any of it matters though. Your life has meaning, Katie. I'm proof of that. But I don't guess anything I can ever say or do will ever convince you of that.”

I found this on his previous diary which he has a link for in the archives. It shows his ability to spill his guts. I like that.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
Yes and no. I wasn’t particularly fond of his most recent updates, but I admire men who write diaries and try hard to convey their feelings in them. I think he has things to say and has difficulty finding the right words.

I suggest he use some diary tools to help him with topics. I also suggest he explore more creative styles of journal writing to help get him out of his writer’s block.

posted by Eli Moose on Thursday, February 28, 2002

87th requested review is of supersharp
Rating out of 10: 2

layout etc. (2: 0)
Part of me thinks that this is a joke. I mean, did this person think that I was going to like their diary? Have they read any of my reviews?

The first and biggest problem it has is a busy background. Stare at it for more than 5 seconds and your eyes will hurt. The dots literally start to move around on the screen.

After my eyes tried to adjust to that, I was forced to zero in on a little tiny rectangle in-line scroll box where the diary entries can be found. Are there any previous and next links at all? Of course not! That would make sense. The links at the bottom labeled mulder and scully for some insane reason go to the archive page and the current page only.

Can you tell I’m pulling my hair out right now?

The archive page’s text is centered. I almost laughed out loud when I realized that not even the text on the archive page is something I found acceptable. Why don’t people stick to aligned text? Why? Do your eyes automatically look for text in the center of a page? Mine don’t.

Annoying writing habits (2: 0)
Where does one begin? First of all I am not sure this person knows how to use html because there are even entries that contain code. Is this something that will again be blamed as the fault of Diaryland? Poor, poor Diaryland takes all the blame for design mistakes.

I give up. The whole thing is annoying. I don’t think the person even cares about this though.

Unique: (2: 1)
It has to get a point in the unique department. It is so bad in so many ways that it is uniquely awful.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 0)
“BOOYAH-I only smoke weed when I need to, and I need to get some rest. I confess, I burned the hole in the matress, yes yes it was me.”

“This is me tnong being an;e tp , and I want to type, becayse there are things I need to sat. Byt no. This is me here agterb the biggest inspriation of my lige and this os what I hvae tlleft to say. I am a mess.”

“I always get what I want.
I guess I don't care if that little girl keeps my layout... she hasn't even said she hasn't stolen it. She KNOWS she copied my source code, and I think that's cute. After all, everyone DOES want my skills...”

Someone stole your layout? You can’t be serious.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
Some strange part of me was actually interested in reading the entries for no other reason than to see what the hell this person would write next. It was a funny experience for me because it defies everything I think a diary is about.

This is not a diary this is scribble. Is it a scribble diary maybe? If so it is in a class all on its own. Far away from anything I would actually read again.

I give them one point for their creative imagination, and for the mere guts to send this diary to me for review.


posted by Eli Moose on Wednesday, February 27, 2002

86th requested review is of i will crawl
Rating out of 10: 8

layout etc. (2: 2)
This is absolutely gorgeous, for the most part.

I see here a great eye for layout, but no one is perfect so I only have a few suggestions on color.

Sit back and take a look at the picture for a moment. The title this is how I feel along the bottom doesn’t work very well in white. I’m thinking that there probably isn’t a font that will work very well without getting lost against the picture. The only thing I can suggest is to use Photoshop on the picture and fade the background color of the section that you want the title to appear. By doing that you make the background behind the text less of a problem.

I will crawl works okay the way it is in burgundy because the part of the picture it is on is light enough that the text stands out. The only problem I have with this is I don’t see how the two sentences are related.

I will crawl. This is how I feel? Does that go well? I’m not sure. Also, I don’t get why the same, this is how I feel line is repeated under the picture at the top of the table. I think once is enough maybe.

What’s missing on the entry pages is a link back to the home page. I actually had to go back to it. A link would be helpful.

When I first began this review site I used to harp on people who had long, whiney disclaimers. I actually do not agree with a diary disclaimer anyway because I feel if a person wants to put their diary on public display they forgo the right to tell anyone who can and cannot read it with a disclaimer. I am scratching my head while reading this one because it is actually funny. It’s not really a disclaimer though.

Annoying writing habits (2: 1)
I almost can’t believe I haven’t found any. This is completely baffling me. I am not finding annoying habits? Come on!

Ohhh, I take that back. I found some in her older entries. She of course has a run away period, or what is formally known as the ellipsis throughout them.

Also in older entries she neglected to capitalize things although she has stopped doing that. Good for her.

Unique: (2: 1)
I really like how her main page is set up. I remember my first ever 10-point diary was set up this way. I wish I could imitate it without getting caught! But seriously, it’s perfect. I like that it gives a short introduction to each entry with a link at the end to it.

At the end of the entry there is a space where she links to the entry from a year ago. I’ve seen this before as well, but not that often. I really like this feature.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
"He draws me into it in a way that makes it easy to forget about other people. It's an overused metaphor, but I'm in another world when I'm in his arms and there just isn't room in that for anyone else. I can feel all his attention directed at me and all my attention wants to go right to him. I don't care about others as much as I do for him; I know this and I don't think they shouldn't know where they stand; why should I worry about what they think?"

"It scared me, though, that she guessed it so easily. Does that mean other people will? Will I ever learn how to bring up the subject discreetly or talk about homosexuality without giving myself away? I'd hoped to be able to test people carefully for homophobia to judge if I should tell them or not, but can I do that without risking giving something away to someone who is homophobic?"

"finally, i get to the point of this entry. i wanted to get all that out of the way before i told you what happened. this afternoon, as my mom and i drove back from the airport where we'd dropped off my aunt cheri [and cousins snuffles & junior], i finally managed to say, 'i'm gay'."

"I know I still like girls, so it doesn't "make" me straight, but being attracted to any guy feels like betrayal. What about the gay community? What about all they've worked for to get a place in a world that's predominantly heterosexual? Am I just giving in to the socially desirable norm which patriarchal heterosexism tries to force all women into, instead of taking the risk to make a political stand and dating another woman?"

Would I go back for another read? (2: 2)
This diary is tops in my book. The author writes well, and has a well-rounded life with lots of interesting things to say. I could spend a long time getting to know her through her entries. Plus, she cares a lot about the appearance of her diary as well. It has excellent navigation as well as a personal touch.

Through a lot of you out there, from those that closely scrutinize every single review, to the casual reader, I have gleaned a lot of what the journal community feels about diaries. Some say, “I write for myself.” Some say, “I write for me, but I also want hits.” Others openly admit that having a large amount of readers is one of the most important things about their diaries.

If you are going to have any kind of website in which you allow readers to visit it freely, content and design are both key elements. In doing my own personal surfing of online diaries I seek to find harmony between design and content. I believe I have truly found it at this diary.





posted by Eli Moose on Tuesday, February 26, 2002

85th requested review is of Syaffolee
Rating out of 10: 7

layout etc. (2: 2)
This is an interesting title, which I think must be a name, but why is the SYA underneath it?

The picture chosen is nice, I enjoy it.

I find this basically cute and simple. My kind of layout, but what is wrong with making things a little bit easier to read by enlarging it somewhat? Go ahead make that table bigger, it’s ok. Just don’t overdo it.

Black is a good background color and it would work better with the text and link colors if the text size was larger. Follow my suggestion to enlarge it please. I hate having to change the setting on my computer!

Why is there a link for the blog on the blog? Just curious.

I can’t bring myself to take away a point because the size is too small. What can I say, I’m being nice today.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 0)
Are her paragraphs too long or are they just squished into the small table?

She tricked me by not using them on the current page, but I found loads of ellipses in the archives.

I also found slang words like sorta, and cause as well.

I almost feel bad about saying this, but I think that the author needs to write out her entries in word format first so that she can use spell check. I found 3 spelling errors just in the quotes I chose from the blog alone. Sheesh.

Unique? (2: 1)
I enjoy how she puts a section at the end for links. I know that she isn’t the only one that does this, but I haven’t seen many diaries lately doing it. I like interesting links provided by interesting people, with commentary of course!

I also like how she doesn’t use the links as her diary entry, like others out there. You know who you are.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
“I'm not squeamish about alcohol itself; I would have no qualms if everyone drank responsibly. But I hate it when I have to worry about and take care of people who are passed out and vomiting. My philosophy is that others can do whatever they want as long as they don't take an advantage over someone else. If I'm forced to take care of someone because they delibrately did something, that's taking advantage of me.”

“When a woman loudly complains that she's too fat and needs to go on a diet, I cringe. The people who publically obsess about their weight are nowhere near overweight. In fact, they probably bear more resemblance to Kate Moss than Roseanne in the first place. When will they learn to find a medium that they will be happy with?”

That is something to think about.

“The truth, ladies and gents, is that old women wearing guady clothes and blabbering about nothing scare me. Oh yes, they may seem cute, adorable, and harmless, but not if they whack you on the head with one of those monstrosities of umbrellas.”

They scare you? That is so funny. They don’t scare me, what does scare me is the potential I have to be like that when I’m old. Funny, funny.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 2)
I can honestly say I was not bored by this diary, not in the least. I loved her writing style. I even liked how it has evolved from a “daily rant” style, to more of a diary.

I could tell that the writing has improved a lot in the recent entries. If the author aimed for that improvement I applaud her. Good job.




posted by Eli Moose on Monday, February 25, 2002

84th unrequested review is of razberee
Rating out of 10:2

Layout etc. (2: 1)
The layout isn’t too complicated so navigation is why this gets a point.

The background isn’t obtrusive but unless you make the connection with the fact that her user name is razzberee you are going to wonder why there are berries all over the place. Maybe a simple banner at the top of the page to highlight the name would help unify the theme. Adding to the confusion is the pseudo-title “Just maybe I AM poisons.” Are raspberries poisonous? What does this mean? I am a little baffled by this. (When I returned to the website one week later the background had been changed, still using an image of raspberries and now the journal banner has: “You Like My Doggy Style, Don’t Lie.” Given that the girl who keeps the journal has time to make these changes it would be nice to see her take that same energy to create a thematically consistent site.)

I am not crazy about the colors chosen for the links and the font is a little small. Make the font larger and make the colors a little more coordinated with the rest of the page and this could work a bit better. I would also love to see the links more unified with the raspberry theme rather than being all over the place. “Spankings” work for some people but not for everyone. And “Here Kitty Kitty” is cute but not very berry-ish. (Again, upon a second visit I found that the fonts had been changed as well as the background color. The text for the links stayed the same, however.)

The links work where you can explore the photos and other writing on her geocities page if you don’t mind the pop-ups. That said, not all of the links on the geocities page worked.

Annoying Writing Habits: (2: 0)
Is this a log or a journal? Logs are short and frequent entries sprinkled throughout the day. Is it really necessary, however, to have 7 entries in three hours? One entry is a quote from a song and nothing more.

I am bored with the mood icons. If you can’t tell me your mood through your writing about it then don’t bother. If I can’t deduce your mood from what you post then you don’t care enough to tell me and if you don’t care enough to write about it why should I care about a cute little icon?

And whatever happened to capitalization? It worked for cummings and a few others. But it is getting abused just like certain punctuations.

One word: ellipses.

Unique: (2: 1)
Yes and no. I really do like the berries and maybe if some of the links were changed to be more thematic then it would be great. Calling her friends list “Playmates” and her comments “Hit That Ass” and “Spankings” would imply a totally different type of journal.

So it gets the point begrudgingly because of the raspberries but nothing more. Make some changes. Dare to be different. This is your journal. Let your journal reflect who you are.

Quotes from the diary: (2:0)
“I wish...

oh nevermind.”

Believe it or not, that’s the entire entry. Ellipses and all. Why bother posting? I wish I knew what she wished. Never mind; I don’t really.

“And don't even ask me if I do like it that way.. if you don't know by now, then you never will... and most definitely because you wont ever get IN my ass.

its all about my ass you see.”

An example of ellipses abuse, capitalization neglect, and run-on sentences.

“No more quizzes for me, no more posting them or taking them.
I don't give a fat shiznit what breakfast club character I would be.
and I already know what kind of a fruit I am.
Read the name biznatch.
lol.
I'm irritated and silly at the same time
cuz those testy/quizy posts are driving me ape shit.”

Thank you. I get tired of them too.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 0)
In order for me to want to go back for another read, I need to feel that I made a connection with the person on some level. Whether it be intellectual interest or morbid curiosity, something needs to draw me back. I just don’t feel like I got inside this person enough to care about what she is going to say tomorrow or next week. I read back over entries as far back as 2000 and the writing style hasn’t evolved in two years nor has the need to post multiple little nothing posts. (Did I honestly see a post that was only the word “sigh”?) If there were some evolution (i.e. improvement) then perhaps.

At least she isn’t posting quiz results anymore. Maybe there is hope for change.

posted by Talulah Lamb on Sunday, February 24, 2002

83rd unrequested review is of Plume
Rating out of 10: 6

Layout etc. (2: 1)
The layout is surprisingly simple. The writer is verbose and very introspective. This young man likes to write and post pictures so if you like to read a lot and/or like journals with photos, you'll enjoy this journal. Personally, I am a sucker for Calvin and Hobbes so the dancing Hobbes at the top pleased me in spite of the fact that it is meant to encourage the reader to promote his journal.

So why the points off? The writer has created a minimalist style but then clutters it with links, links, and more links. Also, although it is nice to see pictures, they would be more effective as a link giving the person reading the journal the option of not having to view everything from the snow on the ground to the soup mom made for dinner. Or maybe the size of the pictures could be reduced. Limit the number of links and give the reader a little more control over what, if anything, he/she wants to see and this would be a true minimalist journal.

Annoying Writing Habits: (2: 2)
I think we all have writing quirks that are most likely to show up in our journals than anywhere else so I never expect to find none. The only time I will take points off is when the annoying habits are intrusive. Any quirks I noticed in this journal were too few and far between to bother me so no points off.

Unique: (2: 0)
Not especially. I don't really think that the person keeping this journal cares to make this site unique. One could argue that links to archives entitled "Old Stuff" and one to email the writer labeled "Stuff Me" is unique. Unfortunately, I don't think that qualifies as evidence of something that truly is unique.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
"I've had some great dreams lately. Just small ones. They feel so real. I miss the times when I'd do nothing all day and sleep when I felt like it. And I knew I would dream. Going to bed was like going to the movies. Except for the popcorn of course."

I would love to know what some of these dreams were. I think they would make for interesting reading. Maybe I am just overly curious.

"I know I'm supposed to be all depressed and stuff but gosh darned it, it's almost worth being alive on a day like this. And continuing with the clichés, it's hard to imagine that there can be so much cruelty and pain in a world so beautiful. I think everyone should move to Greenland. Who'd want to wage war when you could sit in front of an open fireplace and drink hot coco?"

"FUX! I was supposed to make an entry at exactly 20:02 20/02 2002 and be all smart and palindromy but I missed it due to stupid watch alarm crappiness. It won't happen again in a million billion years and frankly I'm disappointed in myself for losing such a great opportunity to make a pointless post. Damnix."

I don't know why but I get a kick out of anyone who can verb a noun. Okay. So palindromy is an adverb. I still enjoy it when people have fun with words.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
I probably will. I especially like his upbeat posts. I truly admire someone who can be so brutally introspective which is how he usually is when he is unhappy. Is it wrong for me to want him to be a happier person? I hope not.

Review by: Talulah Lamb

posted by Talulah Lamb on Saturday, February 23, 2002

I have a new co-reviewer who will be posting reviews this weekend! Her name is Talulah Lamb and you can send requests for review starting today to her as well as me. In a few days I will have her address added to the submission page. Now for today’s review:

82nd requested review is of Simka
Rating out of 10: 5

layout etc. (2: 1 )
The splash page is interesting. Who would have thought to use a picture like this? Of course someone later will tell me that if I see a butterfly it means I’m crazy.

I think everything on the splash page works technically except I don’t really get why she used the arrows at the ends for links that she already has in text? I would suggest doing away with those.

Although I like how her diary is formatted on the screen I do wish she would use previous and next links at the top to help people like me navigate through the entries. I know I am not the only one that appreciates these!

I would make the font size a little bigger on the diary because for one, reading on red is a already a little difficult without the font being small as well. One other thing, why is the font so big on the archive page? Is there a specific reason it is not the same as the rest?

Where you wondering as well what the title means? She defined it for us on her bio page!

Oh - simka means "Happiness" in Hebrew. And the butterfly theme is from the idea that just when a caterpillar thinks that the world is ending, it becomes a butterfly.

The paragraphs in the entries do not flow as well as they would if she put spaces between every paragraph.

I would like it better as well if she used the titles to her entries on the entry page. I am really into titles. I think there undeniably needs to be a v-link color set so that I can tell which entries I’ve looked at and which ones I haven’t too.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 0)
It didn’t take me long to find this one; I detest using asterisk to stress words in a sentence.

She is another one that trails off into thought using an ellipsis, but at least they aren’t littered all over the page in the recent entries. I noticed in the older ones it was a lot worse.

Maybe, just maybe she uses parenthesis too much.

Unique: (2: 2)
I like how she has her text table scrolling up over her background. I know I’ve seen this done in different ways before, but the way she has it is really unique and works better than most.

I also think it is unique that she has chosen a quote to use at the top that in a way defines her diary.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
“I used to be tough. Resilient and sturdy. Stupid things just didn’t bother me. Mushy movies didn’t make me cry. The scary stuff might keep me up at night, but no-one would ever know. You had to be tough, growing up in my family. While not short on love, we weren’t gentle on each other, expecting a lot and not pussyfooting around.
My Mom wasn’t particularly sentimental, in general. And when she was, she was fierce about it, not weepy.”

“Valentines Day is about love, and expressing that love. Not just romantic love. And I’m so glad that I spent last Valentines day with my Mom, Dad, and Sibling. There’s no-one and nothing I love more.
Happy Valentines Day.”

Awwww.

“So… people amaze me. The hypocrites, the ones that have some sort of issue with the truth or have some agenda that I just *cannot* be bothered to try to figure out. And you know what? They think we don’t know. They do. Really. They trot around, parading the same stories, over and over and over, just a slightly (maybe) different spin, with a new excuse/reason/rationale (maybe) and expect that you’ll keep on buying into it all… They assume, anticipate, they proceed along as though their little constructed truth is The Truth. Fully unaware that you just aren’t that dumb. That you’ve seen the flaws. The holes. The faulty logic, the outright lies. And that you’re looking at them with your head cocked to the side, like a dog hearing a new sound, with a quizzical expression on your face.”

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
There is one thing I can say for her, she is not a woman who is at a loss for words. When she writes, she knows what she wants to say, and she has a lot of it to say. I just didn’t find myself glued to my seat waiting for the next entry.

The material she covers is vast and I believe a lot of my readers will probably relate to her and find her diary a nice one.



posted by Eli Moose on Friday, February 22, 2002

81st requested review is of Magic Bus
Rating out of 10: 5

layout etc. (2: 1)
This is a themed blog if I have ever seen a themed blog! At first glance I thought my eyes were fooling me, but no I was right. It is an almost daily blog about riding the public bus.

The layout is not bad, but not altogether great either. With a theme like this, I think I would pull out all the stops to make it look outrageous. With a few extras this could be a real trend-setter.

What would I do to it? I’d probably go and take pictures of people on the bus, maybe even ask their permission to use them on my webpage. I’d take pictures of anyone and anything related and cut and paste them into a layout masterpiece.

The way it is now just isn’t good enough for me. The picture of the bus is too small and although I think the pictures of quarters, Vivarin, and Geni-soy on the side bar are clever, I think that it can be improved with a little more imagination.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
Of course I found my all time favorite ellipsis abuse. Did you know that the ellipsis is really intended to be used when you are leaving out words from a quote? I’m not lying people!

It isn’t funny enough for me. The writing is too dry.

Unique: (2: 1)
This theme wrote the book on unique in blogs. I appreciate what the writer is trying to do with this idea. I think if it is improved upon it could get lots of attention and many more readers.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
“Another empty-bus Friday. Don't other people have to work on Fridays? Where is this big no-work Friday party going on, and why haven't I been invited? Just Nursing Home Guy when I got on, loudly discussing the infrequency of the local bus routes, and going on and on and on about it.”

“Only Nursing Home Guy was on this morning, and also a shadowy stranger in the very back. Because I'm a wuss, I pretended to be urgently consulting my pay stub as I wrote my notes. I feel like Harriet the Spy. Remember that coolest of books from elementary school? Nursing Home Guy and the driver were having a jolly conversation this morning. The driver even said hi to me when I got on, so she must have been in a better mood than usual. Maybe she likes it when NHG talks to her.”

Surely since you decided to write about your bus trips you can find something more interesting to say than this?

“Mondays are always so tiring. My sister was staying overnight so I was sufficiently discombobulated this morning as to have to return to the house twice - to get my shoes and also, embarrassingly, my fare. Yes, I had to make the Walk of Shame twice. At least it's not as bad as the Walk of Rejection on those days when the bus just does not show.”

The walk of shame eh? That’s not funny enough! Come on you know you want to diss on the other passengers or the drivers more than this. I know you do. I’ll be waiting.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
If you have ever depended on public transportation this is the blog for you. I personally would prefer if the author made their writing have more of a humorous flare. As it is now it seems a bit stale. It doesn’t tell a complete story or anything which I wish it did.

What I would suggest is a complete story for each morning’s bus ride. From time of getting up to the end of the ride. It would take a lot more time to compose those enteries, but it would be worth it. I would also suggest a lot more humor. I know I’ve said that a lot already, but it can’t be pulled off as successfully without it I’m afraid.


posted by Eli Moose on Tuesday, February 19, 2002

80th requested review is of poetaster
Rating out of 10: 8

layout etc. (2: 2)
What can I say? I’m ecstatic. This is simple yet elegant. Some may say it is just plain black and white, but I think this is the new trend in diaries. I prefer this kind of diary than too much business that overloads the reader.

I don’t think I can find a single thing wrong with this, except that I think that the typeface should be the same everywhere to add more consistency. He even has previous and next links at the top and bottom of his entries. Amazing.

I think one other thing should be done to the layout. This diary should be given a title.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
There are too many poems and stories used as diary entries, although maybe I should have expected this when the diary URL indicates a lesser poet. I would prefer they have their own little section, but I do understand that diaryland doesn’t allow that unless you own some of your own web-space.

I prefer it when someone makes up names rather than uses initials to keep someone anonymous, but that’s just me. I think it makes the diary feel more real if I don’t have to read initials.

Unique: (2: 1)
I think this diary stands out among the diaries I have read lately. It is unique in that it is completely different by a lot of standards. The writing is awesome, and the layout is very tasteful.

I enjoyed the way he quoted someone’s diary and made his own poem to match her words. That was quite lovely indeed.


Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
“And yes I know what you mean about waiting for something to go wrong. I sense in myself a tendency to suspect all happiness—to brace for the tragedy that is sure to accompany it. But, M——, if you have a good thing, I urge you to do all in your power to build it up and to ensure its future.”

“Then I caught your glance, somehow, across the room, and it struck me to the core; I don’t know why. I sat shaking, unconscious of time, unable to look back at you. Your eyes seemed to contain all the oceans of a million mysterious dark planets in universes unknowable to man—I fancied I’d catch a glimpse of something, some touch of humor or more-than-ordinary intelligence, at their periphery, but once they turned full upon me, they were the inscrutable eyes of a goddess or a sphinx, unreadable.”

Wow, how romantically poetic.

“To oversee the butcher of a score of civilians, to lose a leg in the service of hell and death—is this not enough to win the bestial admiration of hoi polloi?”

Would I go back for another read? (2: 2)
Absolutely.

Although this is a relatively new diary, I found his writing very refreshing. I particularly enjoyed how I felt I was getting glimpses into his soul. It makes me want to meet him and find out more about him.

It has been a long time since a diary has done that for me. I almost can’t believe a man, a true romantic, wrote these words. I only encourage him to write more of his own writing instead of quoting a lot of other things.


posted by Eli Moose on Monday, February 18, 2002

79th requested review is of Your Only Girl
Rating out of 10: 4

Layout, etc.: (2:1)
The design is nice and simple: a still from the Virgin Suicides showing Kirsten Dunst and movie siblings reclining on a bedroom floor and then a table with that day's entry. This set the mood for this diary from the first glance - that of a late teenage girl (I assumed she is still a teenager from her interests and writing style) and her melodramatic love life living in a dorm. This large pic was certainly nice the first time, but as I read through her diary, it became tedious to have to scroll down one full screen every time I clicked a link.

I have assumed that her diary is called "Your Only Girl" because of its URL, but it is called "Obviously, Doctor, you've never been a thirteen year old girl" (another Virgin Suicides reference), which is what is in the title line of the screen. Or it may be "You're a stone fox..." which is what appears directly under the picture and above the entry and is the first text on the page, however I doubt that since it is part of a scroll down box that has most of her navigation links. A rather cryptic heading to place as the lead in to the nav-links, but I found them easily enough.

To avoid repeating myself ad finitum, I won't mention how helpful it would be to have previous/next links at the top as well as at the bottom of the entry. I will also not mention how much I am sick of emoticons.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
"I know this entry is damn boring but I've not got much to say."

Thanks for pointing that out.

"When I was leaving Ryan at the train station, I tried to hold back the cliched tears. It was horrible. I felt that everyone was watching the poor sappy, crying girl. I couldn't speak. Ryan wasn't making it any better by continually grabbing my hand and holding it close to him saying "Don't let go!" I had to melt. I love this boy more than anything and it pained me to see him go. Before he had gone I made him two turkey sandwhiches for the ride and sent him off with a liter of Coke."

Clichéd tears indeed.

"So I call my mom from work to tell her that she can make my bank desposits without my having to send her my bank card. "By the way", she says, "Maia found a condom in Ryan's wallet. Did you know about this? Where was he planning on using it? Did you guys use it when you went over to your dorm? Shannon, this is disturbing." Mind you, my mother knows that I have sex. Hell, she even offers to buy me condoms. Doesn't she know that I have enough respect not to do it in her own house? Of course we used it in my dorm. I hadn't told her that. He's not some pervert guy that brings condoms wherever he goes expecting to get laid. In fact, he brought two, one we did use on Saturday. The other is presently now in my posession, happily tacked on my cork board above my desk, proudly displaying in big block letters, "LARGE". High expectations? I think not."

This is the sort of thing I wanted more of - more about her life and what she thinks about it.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
Add a new pet peeve to my list of annoying grammatical tics: multiple exclamation marks, as in "I will no longer go hungry!!!" or "On another note... OH MY GOD PHANTOM PLANET NOW HAS A SINGLE OUT!!!!!! Dude."

Unique: (2: 0)
Although I liked the design (except for the annoyingly large pic) and I think the writing is OK, there is nothing here that you can't find in a hundred other journals out there.

Would I go back for another read?: (2: 1)
For a while I was interested in what she was writing. Like a good soap opera, I waited, expecting some pay off, conclusion, or development. However, having read every entry, I must say that I found the "story" (for lack of a better term to describe the narrative that unfolds over the course of the diary) to be unsatisfying. This is not to say that the author's life is uninteresting, indeed, it is the very opposite. However she leaves so much out that I felt like I am being denied the juiciest parts of the story. Too many times she alludes to something scandalous or intriguing without telling us what happened. There were too many 20-word entries that neither gave me an insight into her life nor into her thoughts or reactions. There is potential here. Hopefully she will become a more confident writer and invest a little more of herself into the entries. With that hope, I will check back again, but not daily.

posted by Eli Moose on Sunday, February 17, 2002

Important Update:

I know that there has been a lot of confusion lately with my email address and with Miranda Celeste disappearing without a trace for a few weeks. I have received a small list of requests that were sent to her and have been working on them in the order she had them listed.

In lieu of the current situation I decided to list my queue here today in order. The top one of the list is the next one in line and so forth on down the list.

If you do not see your diary listed here and have already requested a review please email me to re-request it. For some reason I have not received it. Please keep in mind to remove the anti-spam ie: REMOVE part from my email address. In the future requests found on the guestbook can't always be honored because I do not always remember to add them to the email queue in the right order.

One last thing, if you are interested in being a reviewer, please take into consideration that I will need someone that is willing to do at least 3 reviews a week. If you can't handle that amount of work, please do not bother sending me any emails. I hope that is understandable.

I am very sorry for the inconvience that some of you have experienced in the amount of time it has taken for me to get your requests from Miranda. I hope you realise there was nothing I could do.

Here is the queue list in order as of today:

http://youronlygirl.diaryland.com
http://poetaster.diaryland.com
http://www.envy.nu/altaica
http://www.flopka.net/bus.html
http://www.simka.org
http://www.geocities.com/syaffolee/blog
http://krista.rupture.net/this/
http://gregnsara.com
http://supersharp.diaryland.com
http://danielreid.cjb.net
http://fenia.net/blogger.htm
http://www.jfive.org

posted by Eli Moose on Tuesday, February 12, 2002

78th requested review is of Star Surfer
Rating out of 10: 3

layout etc. (2: 1)
What is the first thing I notice here? Small sized colored text. I prefer black text and to have the color limited to the link colors, but at least it is readable because the background of the table is white.

I despise the little emoticons used on diaries. I can't wait until this gets phased out of use.

This is a very basic layout and works fine for me. I think the picture at the bottom is adorable as well. It takes a certain kind of personality to pull it off though.

The navigation needs to be improved. Located at the very bottom of the entry is a small link for backwards and forwards movement between entries that is only indicated by these symbols, < >. I just don't think that is enough. What is wrong with making it clear where these links go and using them at the top and bottom of the entries.

She uses a listing of her last five entries linked but they look like an afterthought at the bottom of the page. Why not draw more attention to these so they become more useful to the reader?

She has a drop down link box at the bottom as well that works fine and is not intrusive in the design, I just don't understand why it says Mmmm in the heading. How should I know this is a links drop down box in the first place?

Why is the email link titled you. This habit of making links confusing is a pet peeve of mine.

Also, why did I have to go through three different links before I actually arrived at the 2001 archives? Don't you think that is a little much?

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
Someone needs to learn the proper use of an ellipsis.

She writes about her job with Naked Reviews a lot. I mean, is everyone that reads your diary really all that interested in this?

I despise the act of just posting snippets of conversations you have with someone on instant messenger instead of actually writing something of interest.

Unique: (2: 0)
I didn't find anything out of the norm here.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
"My nap today was incredibly enjoyable. Just one big sigh of "YAY" when I woke up and realized that..well, I just woke up. It's a great feeling."

This is so profound.

"Naked Reviews has it's new design by me. Being coordinator of that damn thing is just...geezus. Complicated. And then fixing little HTML problems and watching over review requests and scores and reviewers and troubleshooting and dealing with people who don't get the message and blah blah....grrr."

"I realized something last night. Something incredibly important: Not to be mad. Each day should be considered a gift because tomorrow might not be handed to me...so the point of being angry or sad is a waste of time. Especially when an emotion such as those is directed towards another."

Would I go back for another read? (2: 0)
I'm sorry to say that I didn't find anything of interest here.

Maybe this is because writing a diary for a lot of these people is just a place where their friends come and hope to see their names in it somewhere.

This kind of writing does nothing for me.
posted by Eli Moose on Tuesday, February 12, 2002

77th requested review is of Bald Moses
Rating out of 10: 5

layout etc. (2: 1)
The color is nice. I think it is bright and cheery.

I really don't like text centered the way she has it on the main page. My eyes are trained to read text that is aligned.

The way she has her diary entry page set up could be arranged better. The links at the top are randomly spaced, and I have no idea why.

Some of the links are confusing the way it is set up. I don't understand the difference between the archive page and the featured from the past page. Why are these not put together?

The link titled journal should be titled current instead of journal because when reading that link, you are already at the journal. The link takes you to the most recent entry.

The link titled big fatty is not clearly marked and I really despise confusing links. I like to know what I'm clicking on before I go there. I noticed it is a blog of some sort she updates as well.

The previous and next links are just little symbols and only located at the bottom. I'd rather these be clearly marked and located at the top and bottom of entries for easier navigation when reading a lot of entries.

The link marked guest welcome is her guestbook, and that is not clearly marked either. Guests welcome makes it sound like you are able to post to her diary as a guest or something.

Why do we need a link at the top that says journal archives and one at the bottom that says contents when these are the same thing?

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
It is a silly little nitpicky thing, but I hate how she forgets to put a space after she uses an html code in her writing. Like after italic words, or links. Seems she forgets almost every time to put the space and the words run together.

Unique: (2: 0)
Not that I could see.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 2)
"Yes, I am that person. The crazy cat/dog person. The person without a significant other, who instead, dvotes all of the attention she might otherwise lavish onto her own family onto her cat and dog."

"If you are reading this, chances are you are a regular reader of online journals. I can't promise you that my journal is so completely different from anything you've ever read before, because I'm sure that it is not. I'm not an extremist. I'm the kind of person who, when filling out those Cosmo questionnaires always rates in the middle. I'm average. Terribly average. Most of my issues are self-created, and self-perpetuated. I live to torture myself."

"My breasts are the perfect shape, and suit me just fine. I have awesome cleavage, and I announce to the world this one thing: you'll be seeing more of it. Oh fear not. I mean that."

Oh my!

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
I just do not have the time. She says so herself in her bio that she is pretty run of the mill and just a little on the average side.

I did enjoy her writing style compared to a lot I have seen lately though, which is saying quite a lot actually.

posted by Eli Moose on Sunday, February 10, 2002

Although I am not exactly looking for a new co-reviewer, if any of you out there are interested in doing it, please inquire about it through email. Tell me why you think you could be a diary critic.

76th requested review is of Tripe Writing
Rating out of 10: 5

layout etc. (2: 1)
Well what can I say about tulips on a green background? It looks a lot like a garden. Although if I were to go garden variety I’d try for a more Zen look, this is not that bad overall.

Even though I normally do not appreciate busy backgrounds because they make journals harder to read; this background is not so bad because it is a very slight business, which actually works.

There is a problem with the light pink colored text that is used for all the links. It is just not that simple to read, although the title is easier because it is a larger font. The links located at the left are even harder to read because they are coupled with a busy font as well as the light pink color, which makes my eyes squint.

Because everything is easy to locate, and it all seems to work I give this layout two points. Aesthetically changing the font color of the links and switching to a less froufrou font on the left table would enhance its appearance though.

On the technical side, the links located at the top of her archive pages did not work.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
She tends to use little faces throughout her writing. I’d much rather see some expression of feeling through words than a face.

Unique: (2: 1)
I liked the way she has pictures set up as pop-up links. It allows the reader to view the picture while still being able to continue reading without using the back button. It also prevents a clutter of pictures mingled with her text. Good idea.

I’ve seen this Friday five all over the place lately, but just not in a journal I’ve had the opportunity to critique. I think I like this idea, but in order to pull it off (this is for everyone) you really need to be creative, otherwise it could get dull and over-used.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
“My body seems to have gone completely to pot. I'm hormonal again already. Either that or I'm developing some kind of personality disorder! Oh the joys of being a woman >:( Hubby reckons he can monitor my hormone levels by the number of "Oh for fuck's sake!" I utter in a day. Ordinary days will only have one, maybe two, moments of sufficient frustration to produce this, muttered fairly quietly under my breath.”

“Isn't falling down the toilet every child's nightmare? When I was a kid we never had a potty seat so my sister and I solved this problem my sitting on the toilet at the same time - there was plenty of room for two little bottoms. We didn't often actually use the toilet at the same time - the other one was just there for moral support and to raise the alarm if disaster struck. The thing that really used to scare me was flushing the toilet. The cistern was high on the wall with a chain hanging down that neither of us could reach without standing on the lid. As I was the eldest it was always my job to stand on the lid of the toilet to pull the chain. I w as convinced that one day the lid would break and I would fall through, disappearing round the U-bend.”

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
Although I probably wouldn’t add her to my favorite’s list just yet, I didn’t yawn too much. I found a lot of interesting links to other journals by reading her updates.

I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m more of a diary-reading girl than I am what is considered a blog reader. I prefer reading entries that are generally full of writing that is centered around the writer’s life rather than links to things they found interesting on the internet. To me this is not just diary, but a diary/blog combination.

Even though I didn’t find myself on the edge of my seat reading about her life, I’m sure there are those of you out there that will relate to her and find her fascinating.



posted by Eli Moose on Thursday, February 07, 2002

Unfortunately Miranda Celeste will not be reviewing for this site anymore. As well, if you have emailed her asking for a review please contact Eli with the name of your diary, the website url, and the date of your first request. I will make those requests priority. My apologies to anyone that has been waiting for a review from Miranda, I was unable to get in touch with her until recently.

75th requested review is of Eloquence wrapped in a box
Rating out of 10: 5

layout etc. (2: 2)
I don’t know exactly what I like so much about gray and black, but it is so soothing to my soul.

I love the picture of the coffee mug. I think that should be my motto as the diary critic. I feel like saying that a lot.

I like the way the layout looks as a whole. It is very eye pleasing. Of course you cannot go wrong with tables set up the way these are. This combination always works for a diary format.

The individual entries would be easier to navigate if there were previous and next links located at the top and bottom.

I have to give credit where it is due, I just noticed this layout came from someone else. Look in the bottom left-hand corner and you will see too.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 0)
What is the fascination already with using ellipses? I honestly just wish people had the guts to end a sentence once and for all.

Too many internet tests, and too many songs are used for diary entries. If someone really wants to include those things, why don’t they make separate links for them?
So many quotes that I get confused as to who is saying what and where it is coming from.

I hate the words gotta, and dunno with a passion so strong it makes my bones creak.

Unique: (2: 1)
I like that the last five entries are put to the left at the top of the diary, most people are putting them at the bottom and I don’t find it as useful.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
Gotta love a good (or even a not-so-good) online test. That's what I always say. (Ok, so, well...it's not. Work with me, here, people!)
No, I don’t.

I became violent today. I haven't been angry enough to punch something in months, but I punched the hell out of a public bathroom stall door today.
I want to know more about what’s going on here.

He loved music so much, but could never enjoy it in his own home, in his personal life. He didn't even know what real music was, what it could be, how it could affect people, until he found us. And I think it hurt even more having experienced what his father would not let him enjoy.
How do you convince someone who will definitely die in a few months that their life is worth living? How do you watch the person you love more than life itself wither away before your very eyes? You don't. I can't. Not anymore

Would I go back for another read? (2: 1)
I almost wrote this one off and gave it a zero but then I found the archive for last year. So much more feeling was put into those entries. I liked them much better. The author should get back to that kind of writing, and quick!

I like Dishwalla, hell I even own a CD, but if I wanted to read their lyrics, I wouldn’t be reading diaries. Get my point?

I like to read diaries to read about the personal lives of other people. I want to read about their hang-ups, their sex lives, their phobias and their thoughts.



posted by Eli Moose on Monday, February 04, 2002

74th requested review is of The other cheek
Rating out of 10: 2

layout etc. (2: 1)
What can I say about this layout? It’s pretty plain, but it works. The background is an attention-grabbing textured green color and it looks good enough because with the other tables being colored you do not see much of it.

While I’m talking about color, I personally would not have chosen the green she does of the right table. Mint is just not a color that I prefer, but it doesn’t aesthetically alter the page very much.

I also do not think the orange she chooses for her link color looks pleasant on the mint colored table either. Maybe when she set the link color she had only the beige table in mind.

The title is catchy, but for some reason it is centered over the right table and smaller than I would have it be. I would suggest more attention drawn to the title.

I hope that picture is a caricature of the writer; otherwise I have no idea why it is there.

Although there is not much wrong with the layout, there is not much going for it either. I suggest the writer take the same basic format and change her colors and her graphics. Give this baby a revamp and pep it up some. I think I’m snoring over here.

In going through the archives I ran into some major formatting issues. I’m not sure how it happened, but there is a whole page of paragraphs with two words per sentence. This is hard to read and needs to be fixed pronto.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 0)
Oh no. Did she not read any of my reviews before she requested one? I think she takes her use of ellipses to the extreme; sometimes she uses a string of 15 periods in a row. Imagine my surprise.

I also think she invented her own punctuation. Instead of always using ellipses she also strings dashes together. How annoying!

Unique: (2: 0)
No, I don’t think so.

Quotes from the blog (2: 1)
"Another year comes to its grande finale ! 2001, in RL, brought the death of many close friends here in Cheekville--------last night we said goodbye to Paula. Paula was an old high school chum of Joe's. She was full of piss and vinegar--- at all times!!! She leaves a sterling legacy."

"I looked in the mirror this morning. I saw Jay Leno. Well, someone who looks like Jay Leno anyway. Post-op day 2: the dental surgery saga continues. My lower jaw is 5 times its normal size and hurts like the dickens. I am taking the oxycodone the periodonist prescribed.....I got through the last two surgeries only taking the motrin. This is definitely the worst of the 3."

Would I go back for another read? (2: 0)
I am giving this some slack because it works more like a blog than it does a diary. I do not particularly go to diaries to read internet tests and see pictures of what kind of cookies the writer plans to bake that day, but for a blog it works out fine.

I did not find her style of blogging interesting and I don’t think I’ll be popping over to read ever again. It was not in her favor that a lot of her blog was in a weird format when I paid my visit to her archives. I can't even try to read something that is one to two words per sentence.

posted by Eli Moose on Monday, February 04, 2002

73rd requested review is of too late
Rating out of 10: 5

layout etc. (2: 2)
I enjoy the title and the picture on the main page; I am truly predisposed towards catchy titles. There’s only one thing that should be changed. The blue font color is acceptable on the black background, but the parts that overlap onto the picture is too faint. In order to enhance it, a new color needs to be chosen.

The picture is incredibly attractive and I like it a lot.

The notice,

By visiting this website you give up all your rights to sue me/take me to court or take any sort of legal action against me over the contents. ;) Not that I would slander anyone, not me, never.

is not needed. I would remove that, it makes the site look amateurish. If some sort of copyright notice is needed, something more professional looking would work better.

The cast is called, the deceived. It is very catchy and looks fantastic with the pictures running down the left. I also applaud how she put her quiz results under the page titled the deceiver. It works well used on the bottom of a bio page, well as long as there aren’t too many listed. That would cause quiz overload.

I incurred a technical problem with the previous and next links. Around January 26th, the link takes me to someone else’s diary and the only way to get back to hers is by going back and clicking another entry. I actually think she intended to link to the other person’s diary for about 2 entries, but the way she did it makes it confusing, and the reader can get trapped in the other diary.

Annoying writing habits: (2: 1)
I never said that over usage of ellipses meant the person used bad grammar, but it is annoying to me when people rely too heavily on them for punctuation.

She writes more about other people than she does herself.

I found a few typos, although not in every paragraph. This is why I started editing my entries with word, because we are all not immune to this.

Unique:(2: 1)
I adore the small table she puts above her entries labeled milestones. Inside it she lists diary titles of entries she considers important. This is a very cool idea. I wish I had thought of that first.

Quotes from the diary: (2: 1)
"So now I'm in Edmonton and enjoying it. It's cold outside. No, um, scratch that, it's freezing outside. I wouldn't put my worst enemy out there in a bikini and nought else. That would just be cruel."

"Ooomm... and I finally found my wallet. Even though I lost it in my house, I still have my new bank card. It's all shiney and pretty. So I had money to go shopping last night. I despretly needed new bras and socks, and maybe a sweater because I heard it's a little nippy in Edmonton, and I leave tomorrow."

"I'll wait. Find out what I can. Decide. Do I let him live? Do I let him die? What to do... I'm not sure. I don't want him to suffer. Death is a part of life. A cycle. We all must die eventually. But why, oh why, does it have to be him this time?"

This is about her cat.

Would I go back for another read? (2: 0)
While I have to admit the layout is not bad, the writing needs some improvement. I thought it was going to be better than it was by the looks of the diary, but it just goes to show me that no matter how something looks on the outside, it is the content that makes me go back to read more.

Do I have any suggestions? I don’t think so. I think it is really hard to tell someone how to write in a way that grabs. I think that maybe she has appeal, just not to me. I believe I am more moved by the introspective type of writer.


posted by Eli Moose on Friday, February 01, 2002